This blog is dedicated to my journey of healing from Hashimoto's Disease and Leaky Gut Syndrome through food, supplements, spirituality, and exercise.
Monday, April 15, 2013
Days 1, 2, 3 and 4...Juice and I Get Re-aquainted.
So, onto the next habitual life improvement. Fresh green juice, everyday. While fruits and veggies and I aren't exactly enemies, we aren't as close as I'd like to be either. My goal is to make green food my best friend, so hopefully I'm not coming on too strong. I don't want scare them off like I did with bread.
It's been a challenge to get the juice in everyday, so I've been experimenting with different times to drink it. Mid afternoon seems to be the best. I do notice a gentle increase in energy after having some juice. It's the kind of energy where I just get up and start doing stuff and then an hour later I'm like, "Oh., hey look what I did and it wasn't even hard." There is also no noticeable crash from the energy increase. This is very different from the jittery-must-do-everything-NOW coffee buzz that I get. Juice energy gently rises and then falls into a natural state of normal tired. I'm not gonna lie, I really miss my coffee buzz, so I probably won't give up coffee completely, but I have gone 4 days without it and I've made it through alright. I do not, however, miss the dramatic plane crash that is me coming off of said coffee buzz.
Prepping is key to success when it comes to juicing. If all veggies and fruits are cut and prepped ahead of time, it takes 15 minutes to make juice and clean juicer. So I need to find a good time to make the juice and clean the juicer. Leaving the juicer dirty is not an option. I've tried that, trust me, the mess (or the stink) is not worth it. What does work well is pre-making "juice bags." This is where I spend about an hour to cut all fruits and veggies ahead of time and put the proper portions in a bag so that when it's juice time I can just dump them in and clean the juicer up.
I've come to an understanding that fresh juice is not going to be fast, and if I am committed to this I just have to accept that. Health takes time. It takes slowing down and paying attention not only to what is going into your mouth, but what is going into your mind. My fast paced-busy-every-minute-scheduled-lifestyle is probably what has made me sick in the first place. So if the definition of crazy is to keep doing that same thing over and over and expecting different results...sign me up. I'm definitely in the club. But, I'm learning. Slowly. Everything will not come at once, because it can't and things that come all at once are not sustainable for a lifetime. Slow changes, one step at a time. That's why the turtle wins the race right?
Here's to turtles and the rabbits that learn from them. And here's to hoping that this juicing thing will change my health so slowly that one day I'll need this blog to remember what my life was like before I started.
My food journal follows for the last 4 days...it's getting better and better everyday. Mostly.
Thursday 4/11/13
Exercise: Walked 3 miles with hubby. What? Two days in a row? That's how I role.
Energy: Eh...okay I guess. I did notice an uptick after my juice, but that could be a coincidence.
Breakfast:
1.5 eggs
1 Apple
1/2 Pkg Oatmeal w/ 1 cream
2 Green teas with 1 cream each
Lunch:
3 Chicken lettuce wraps
Popcorn
Pineapple
Snack:
Green Juice - Pineapple, ginger, Swiss chard, spinach
Dinner:
Chicken Breast
1/2C Green beans
1/4C Rice
Dessert:
1 pkg chocolate covered pomegranates.
Friday 4/12/13
Exercise: Walked 6 miles while wildly waving my arms as I talked with a friend. Best. Workout. Ever.
Energy: Tired, again. Even after drinking juice.
Breakfast:
1/2C Yogurt
1/4C Granola
1/2C Pineapple
1 Green Tea w/ 1 cream
Lunch:
Turkey Sammy
Pear
Snack:
Green Juice (2 apples, Kale, Ginger, Parsley)
Dinner:
4 Mini Street Tacos
Tortilla chips
3 Mini Margaritas
Saturday 4/13/13
Exercise: Cleaned my house?
Energy: Even lower than the last 2 days, although that may have something to do with the 3 margaritas from above and staying up until 3am....maybe. The juice helped temporarily.
Breakfast:
1/2 package of oatmeal w/ 1 cream
1.5 scrambled eggs
1 pear
Green tea w/ 1 cream
Lunch:
Rice, black beans, salsa, and avocado
Snack:
Green Juice: (Kale, 2 apples, Ginger, and Parsley
Dinner:
Chinese...
Fried rice
Chicken and Pea pods
Dessert:
Flourless Chocolate Cupcake
Sunday 4/14/13
Exercise: Hot bath with a good book and great music....also cleaning up from family craft day.
Energy: Stable, steady, smooth and mostly calm. Juice at dinner was good, except I was too energetic to go to sleep. Need to have juice earlier.
Breakfast:
Water w/Cayenne pepper
Green powder mix
1/2C Yogurt
1/2C Pineapple
1/4C Granola
Lunch:
Tortilla chips
Hummus
5 Sandwich slice pickles
1 Green tea w/ 1 Cream
Snack:
Flourless Chocolate cupcake
Dinner:
This!
Tandoori chicken over basmati rice....it looked nothing like the picture but it was good :-)
Green Juice (kale, carrots, parsley, ginger, 2 apples)
Dessert:
None...true story.
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Days 20 and 21....A New Habit is Formed
Well, I made it. The three week mark that successfully solidifies a new habit. Aaaaaand...I'm doing great! I think. My energy is still not where I would like it to be, but my Showdown with bread is falling into a distant memory. We are coexisting peacefully, except at restaurants that make exceptionally good gluten products like Panera. I feel like the recovering sharks from 'Finding Nemo' swimming in a tank filled with a school of fish saying 'eat me'! It's probably not the healthiest place for me. As I have said over and over again the last three weeks, lesson learned.
Practicing the self-discipline it takes to go gluten free feels good. I admit that I have consciously ingested one bite of gluten on a holiday, but that is okay with me. Success! The cravings are weakening and I find my most dangerous times are when I have not planned well for food. All bets are off if I get hangry (anger caused by hunger). Costco has helped with this, they have a surprisingly large selection of GF snacks in very large quantities. Also, the coping cake. Let's not forget the Coping Cake...I couldn't have done it without you.
I feel like I am finally figuring out how to practice self-discipline without beating myself up in the process. Practicing life changes with gentleness is a constant process that takes both awareness and forgiveness, I'm getting better at this too.
I am still working on the 'more green juice' piece of my healing. It just feels so exhausting to get the juicer out and clean it on most days. Perhaps I need to do a 21-day habit challenge? Yes I think so. The Happiness Advantage says that you are more likely to do something if you take just 20-sec off of the time it takes to accomplish your desired behavior. Hmmm....how can I take 20-sec off the cleaning of the juicer, any suggestions?
Okay, tomorrow I start the count over....21 days dedicated to drinking 1 glass of fresh juice everyday. The only way to get better and faster at something is to practice, right? You will begin to notice an energy section in my food diary so I can track if the juicing thing is really working. Wish me success, and energy too, if you have some to spare.
Tuesday 4/9/13
Exercise: Reading Cary On, Warrior while listening to the rain and thunder outside. It was heavenly. My eyes were moving quickly so I'm sure I was burning plenty of calories.
Breakfast:
1/2 pack of Oatmeal with 1 pack of cream
Tangerine
1.5 Scrambled eggs
Lunch:
Chicken breast
Tortilla chips
Green juice (spinach, lemon, ginger, and granny smith apples)
Dinner:
Chicken GF/DF nachos
Wednesday 4/10/13
Exercise: 1 hour on the elliptical, for real! Started with 30, then added 20, and then another 10! Super proud of myself for doing this as you can tell by all o the exclamation points. See I told ya the real thing would show up...
Breakfast:
1/2C Yogurt
1/4C Granola
1/2 Banana
Green Tea w/ 1 creamer (I bought a pack of Individual International delight vanilla flavored creamer at Costco...I know this is not good for the environment and believe me I feel guilty every time I throw the little blue plastic container in recycling.), BUT I also want to monitor my cream intake more, because frankly, it was getting out of hand. Did you now that one of those packs has 30 calories? Me neither....I am promising myself that when this package of 182 creams is gone that I will make the homemade versions I found on pinterest, girl scouts honor).
Lunch:
2 Chicken lettuce wraps
1 Pkg 100 cal popcorn
1 Apple
Dinner:
Turkey Sandwich w/ lettuce
6 Baby Carrots
1 Apple
Snack:
1 Handful of popcorn
1 100 cal pack of chocolate covered dried pomegranates (deeeelish!)
1 GF Energy bar
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Day 18 and 19....On Being Gentle.
A few years back, maybe five, a dear friend introduced a new phrase into my life: Be gentle with yourself. I have to admit that at the time I really didn't know what the hell she meant. Be gentle with myself? Had she seen my life? Did she even know me at all?! I was too busy living fast and hard! No, not the drugs, sex, and rock & roll lifestyle. It was more the breastfeeding, babies, and playdates kind of life back then. Yeah, sure we stayed up all night, but I can assure you there was very little sex involved, and all the rocking was done in a chair.
Gentle. Pfft. I was too busy maintaining the perception of being a perfect parent. And that, my friends, was exhausting. There is no time for being polite to yourself when your house of cards might crumble at any given moment, forget gentle.
Here's the thing about having babies: It rocks your world. On. Every. Single. Level.
Everything you knew about life - mentally, physically, spiritually - changes. Not in an instant like the movies and fairytales say, it's more of a slow evolution. Through trial and error of desperately holding onto your pre-baby life, you learn that things are not ever going to be the same. For example, you learn that you can do very well on surprisingly little sleep. You learn that going out and partying until 4am creates a hangover that might actually KILL you. You learn that miracles exist every time your baby smiles. Oh yes and this, you learn there is no such thing as a perfect parent. Eventually.
The perfect parent is a myth parenting magazines and manufacturers have created to sell you new things. Don't get me wrong, some of those things are really, really great. But, none of them will make you a perfect parent. Not even the wipe warmer, I know it seems like something a perfect parent would use, but I have yet to meet a parent who has purchased one and actually used it.
Now, granted, I am a little slow, but it took me years to figure this out. In fact, I'm still trying to figure it out because I still want to believe the perfect parent exists. That I can somehow capture the "perfect parent essence" by finding the right book or piece of advice or service that will make everything fall into place. Then again, I still kind of believe in unicorns too.
I guess my point is this. Please do be gentle with yourself, because if you wait to be kind to yourself until everything lines up just so, it would be like waiting your whole life for a pink unicorn to show up on your front porch. And no matter how much we want to believe this could happen, I think we can all agree that it would be a tragic way to live.
Be gentle with yourselves my friends, because as Glennon Doyle says, we can do hard things.
My eating for the last 2 days follows. I hope you will notice the conspicuous decrease in sugar...and I hope you will not notice the lack of green juice. I'm trying friends. I'm trying. Also please play along with what I count as exercise...maybe someday, the real thing will show up, then again maybe a pink unicorn will magically appear on my doorstep too.
Sunday 4/7/13
Exercise: Sitting at my computer working on a presentation counts right?
Breakfast:
Water with cayenne pepper and lemon
1/2 pack of oatmeal
Mini tangerine
1.5 scrambled eggs
1 Grande, soy, 1.5 pump caramel macchiato
Lunch:
2 Turkey lettuce wraps
1 Apple
1 bag of popcorn (100 calorie pack)
Water
Dinner:
Chicken fajita nachos:
Chicken breast cooked in crockpot with various spices
Tortilla chips
Daiya chedder "cheese"
Lettuce
Tomato
Dessert:
Lemon Popsicle
Monday 4/8/13
Exercise: Working frantically on a presentation for school for 8 hours straight and then giving said presentation. That has to burn a good amount of calories.
Breakfast:
1/2C vanilla yogurt
1/4C GF Granola (granola has a lot of calories, 80 in just a 1/4 cup - weird)
1 Apple
Lunch:
Taco salad
Only 4 Tortilla chips (this feels kinda like a miracle to me.)
Snack:
Popcorn
Dinner:
Chicken breast with taco seasoning
Tortilla chips
Saturday, April 6, 2013
Day 16 and 17....Still Waiting
My energy is still at very low levels, I have not really stuck to my commitments very well the last two days. I want to, I really do, and then life just sorta gets in the way. Planning is not a strong point when I have low energy, and going to Costco was not necessarily the best choice either (Have you been there? I can't decide if it is heaven or hell).
Today was a better day though, probably aided by the fact that the whole family slept in till ten. Man do I love sleep right now. I just can't seem to get enough. But, that may be caused by staying up until midnight - even on school nights. This has to stop, I just can't seem to get over the time change...I swear to you 11 O'clock was my limit before time change and now I just can't get to bed before midnight. I truly believe the people behind the time change are evil. Pretty sure they are just messing with all of us. Seriously, what is the purpose of this arbitrary madness?!?! They just take a whole hour away overnight?!?! Really? REALLY? And we are all supposed to just pretend like it never happened? Where the hell did my hour go? I needed that hour!
Okay, enough ranting and resisting the inevitable...below is my eating for the last 2 days. I can't say I am proud, but hey I am sticking to this GF thing. And I did have less sugar. AND I exercised. I'm getting there. I've never been an all at once kinda girl anyway. Gradual movements. One step at a time. So far I am still waiting to be impressed by this whole health kick thing.
Friday 4/5/13
Exercise: None...drove 4 hours instead to see my mom, which explains some of the interesting choices of food below.
Breakfast:
Oatmeal with cream
1/2 banana
Coffee with cream
Oatmeal with cream
1/2 banana
Coffee with cream
Lunch:
Potato chips
Sloppy Joe (no bread)
Fried Potatoes
Snack:
Popcorn
Rice crispy treat
Dinner:
Fried Egg sandwich
Green juice
Beer
Saturday 4/6/13
Exercise: Walked 5 miles with my sweet hubby
Breakfast:
1/2 C Vanilla yogurt
1/4 C GF granola
1 Small Mango
Coffee with cream
Lunch:
Panera - which is like torture to someone who doesn't eat gluten. I almost attacked my sons baguette 3 times. Seriously, I felt like a newborn vampire from Twilight. It took all I had to maintain control and just eat my salad.
Asian Sesame Chicken Salad (minus won tons)
Potato chips (I really do love potato chips almost as much as bread, they are my friend)
Green tea with cream (I know I promised I would only add cream to coffee, but frankly, I forgot)
Snack:
No Dinner today...ate lunch way too late to have any real dinner
1 handful of Chicago style popcorn
5 tortilla chips
2 Cashew Clusters (Have I mentioned how heavenly these are?)
2 well earned Hard Ciders
No Dinner today...ate lunch way too late to have any real dinner
1 handful of Chicago style popcorn
5 tortilla chips
2 Cashew Clusters (Have I mentioned how heavenly these are?)
2 well earned Hard Ciders
Days 14 and 15....Oh Energy, Where Art Though?
The last two days have proved to be a challenge. My energy reserves are just so very low. I can't figure out if it's just that I am super busy and not getting enough sleep or if there is something wrong...e.g. fighting off an infection, monthly cycle, or if my condition is worsening. Either way, something has got to give soon. I don't want to feel like I must force my way through the day anymore. At the very least I would like the energy to make it through without feeling like I am walking through mud, having some pep left over would be a bonus and gratefully recieved!
To wake up feeling refreshed and ready for the day ahead feels like a pipe dream at this point. It's been 2 full weeks of no gluten and my energy levels are not really changing....very disheartening.
But, as I look over my diet in the last two weeks, there has been lots of sugar and very few vegetables. I am going to start juicing again. Yup, you heard it here first folks...I'm gonna whip out the juicer.
Here is my commitment to myself. I'm counting on you to hold me accountable.
Less sugar, I'm unwilling to go cold turkey on this, but I can commit to less. One glass of fresh green juice most days with lunch or as an afternoon snack. Starting right now. No excuses, just actions. I need to take control of whatever I can....who controls what I eat?!?! I do dammit! I have decided to become friends with the vegetables in my fridge. BFF's. Yup.
Also, I will begin to add 3-4 workouts into my week and will report them here. Let's see if all this "health" stuff really works. I'm pretty skeptical and so is my couch, (and I won't even talk about how insecure the Coping Cake is right now).
Hypothesis: Fresh Green Juice + Exercise x3 - Sugar = More Energy
*Note: I am still feeling quite possessive of my coffee creamer, but I am willing to reduce my use only to coffee.
I will check in with my energy levels on day twenty-eight to see if there is any significant changes. Send a prayer to the energy Gods for me, or to THEE God for more energy, whichever works for you. I can use all the help I can get.
Wednesday 4/3/13
Exercise: None, unless shopping at the mall counts...
Breakfast:
Oatmeal with creamer
1 Fried egg (in coconut oil)
1/2 of banana
1 Coffee with cream
Lunch:
Egg Salad Sammy
Apple
Coping cake
Dinner:
(In this order...)
Pineapple, orange coconut smoothie
Coping cake
Egg salad sammy
Grapes
Thursday 4/4/13
Exercise:
Breakfast:
Oatmeal
1 Boiled egg
1 Coffee with cream
Lunch:
Coping cake (it's gone now and now I am done, no more coping cake unless there is an emergency)
Egg salad sammy
Snack:
Green juice - 2 handfuls of Baby greens, 1 inch of ginger (peeled and sliced), 2 granny smith apples, 1 wedge of lemon, and water
Dinner:
Turkey Sammy 5 cashew clusters Popcorn
Snack:
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Day 12 and 13...Eating My Way to Health
I just realized that this Easter was my very first holiday of no gluten since I was diagnosed. The holidays are always a difficult time to eat differently than everyone else. I have always "allowed myself" just one "treat" on holidays. But, the treat is not really a treat.
The thing I think most people don't understand about food sensitivities is that it's not a diet. I am not trying to lose weight here folks. I am having an immune reaction to certain foods. These foods make my body turn into one big inflamed cell. They make me more susceptible to illness. Eating foods I am sensitive to literally makes me less likely to fight off germs when they attack.
And now that my friends and family understand this for the most part, it's easier to eat my way to a healthier life. Even on the holidays. Even at parties. Trust me, it not a reflection of whether you are a good cook if I turn down your food. It can take years to learn how to say no to your delicious food. Chances are I have eaten it even though I am fully aware that it will likely make me sick. It sucks, I know. I don't like turning down your cookies any more than you do.
Which is why I want to thank my family for being so supportive this Easter. For understanding that turning down the cookies is not personal. It's about my sensitive body. And nothing more.
But see, I don't need cookies to feel loved. In fact, a green smoothie is a much more loving gesture than a cookie. A green smoothie says, I want you to have energy and health. A green smoothie says I want you to live as long as possible.
So the next time you are around a "weird" eater like me, try not to take it too personally when they turn down your freshly baked yumminess, chances are it was really hard for them to say no.
In other news, I've been noticing some other possible addictions....sugar, tortilla chips and coffee creamer. I've decided to reduce the amounts of these things, but I can't decide how to do it...take one out each week? Limit the amount I allow within each day/week. Gradual seems to work best for me. And balance is essential. Any suggestions?
Monday 4/1/13
Breakfast:
2 GF french toast w/ real maple syrup
Apple
1 Coffee with cream
Lunch:
Black beans and Rice with salsa
Tortilla chips
Dinner:
Ham, white bean, and kale soup
Snack:
Oatmeal
3 mini packages of sour patch kids
Tuesday 1/2/13
Breakfast:
1 GF toast with real butter
1 scrambled egg
1 green apple
1 of my usual from Starbucks served in bed from my amazing husband.
Lunch:
1 egg salad sammy (on GF cardboard bread)
1 fresh tomato sliced with a touch of sea salt.
Snack:
1 gummy airplane
1 apple
1 green tea with a touch of honey
Dinner:
Ham soup
Dessert:
GF German Chocolate Coping Cake (This was needed because my sweet mother-in-law brought cupcakes for everyone, and I simply could not trust myself to watch my whole family eat cupcakes without stealing a bite!)
The thing I think most people don't understand about food sensitivities is that it's not a diet. I am not trying to lose weight here folks. I am having an immune reaction to certain foods. These foods make my body turn into one big inflamed cell. They make me more susceptible to illness. Eating foods I am sensitive to literally makes me less likely to fight off germs when they attack.
And now that my friends and family understand this for the most part, it's easier to eat my way to a healthier life. Even on the holidays. Even at parties. Trust me, it not a reflection of whether you are a good cook if I turn down your food. It can take years to learn how to say no to your delicious food. Chances are I have eaten it even though I am fully aware that it will likely make me sick. It sucks, I know. I don't like turning down your cookies any more than you do.
Which is why I want to thank my family for being so supportive this Easter. For understanding that turning down the cookies is not personal. It's about my sensitive body. And nothing more.
But see, I don't need cookies to feel loved. In fact, a green smoothie is a much more loving gesture than a cookie. A green smoothie says, I want you to have energy and health. A green smoothie says I want you to live as long as possible.
So the next time you are around a "weird" eater like me, try not to take it too personally when they turn down your freshly baked yumminess, chances are it was really hard for them to say no.
In other news, I've been noticing some other possible addictions....sugar, tortilla chips and coffee creamer. I've decided to reduce the amounts of these things, but I can't decide how to do it...take one out each week? Limit the amount I allow within each day/week. Gradual seems to work best for me. And balance is essential. Any suggestions?
Monday 4/1/13
Breakfast:
2 GF french toast w/ real maple syrup
Apple
1 Coffee with cream
Lunch:
Black beans and Rice with salsa
Tortilla chips
Dinner:
Ham, white bean, and kale soup
Snack:
Oatmeal
3 mini packages of sour patch kids
Tuesday 1/2/13
Breakfast:
1 GF toast with real butter
1 scrambled egg
1 green apple
1 of my usual from Starbucks served in bed from my amazing husband.
Lunch:
1 egg salad sammy (on GF cardboard bread)
1 fresh tomato sliced with a touch of sea salt.
Snack:
1 gummy airplane
1 apple
1 green tea with a touch of honey
Dinner:
Ham soup
Dessert:
GF German Chocolate Coping Cake (This was needed because my sweet mother-in-law brought cupcakes for everyone, and I simply could not trust myself to watch my whole family eat cupcakes without stealing a bite!)
Monday, April 1, 2013
Day 11....Rebirth
Rebirth. That is what Easter is about right? I mean at it's core? So what better time to start anew, create new habits and gain a new perspective? What better time for Easter than Spring? A time to start over. A time for growth.
At least that's what I've told myself. But, just like the Spring this year, my rebirth seems to be moving in fits and starts. The ice and gloom is melting very slowly. A day of sun and warmth, five days of clouds and snow...I know the color and warmth will come back, it's just that my patience is waning to a dangerously low level.
Doesn't Spring know I'm waiting?!?!
And doesn't my body know I'm waiting for it to catch up to the changes I have made?!?!
I'm tired of being exhausted. I'm tired of wearing a coat everywhere. I am so very bored with the gray and brown landscape in my view and my mind. Waiting is hard. But, life is hard sometimes isn't it? The struggles give shape and depth to our triumphs.
I crave color. I crave the sun. I crave the energy that comes along with the smell of fresh air. I crave rebirth of nature and myself. Maybe that's what this blog is all about. Allowing the old, dead branches that I no longer need fall away into the melting snow, so that new ones can grow. Putting one foot in front of the other and moving in the direction of my faith. Trusting that just like the Spring, my health will come too.
Patience and faith. I can do that for a little longer...right?
My Easter eating....no gluten, but too much sugar. I am hoping to make a dramatic decrease in sugar over the coming weak. I'm thinking sugar is a branch (or crutch) I may no longer need.
Breakfast:
1 Boiled egg
2 pieces of GF french toast with maple syrup
Apple
1 Boiled egg
2 pieces of GF french toast with maple syrup
Apple
1 Coffee with cream
Lunch:
Roasted chicken and veggies
Roasted chicken and veggies
Dinner:
On the Border
3 GF mini chicken tacos
Tortilla chips
On the Border
3 GF mini chicken tacos
Tortilla chips
Snacks:
Easter candy! Not sure how much, lost count after the second Reece's egg. Let's just say that I had enough.
Movie Popcorn
Easter candy! Not sure how much, lost count after the second Reece's egg. Let's just say that I had enough.
Movie Popcorn
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